Frantic, but so good.

The day started with a groggy morning as I woke up with the sounds of my alarm. This is more than I can say for yesterday's late ascedncance out of bed and then rush to get ready. As I meandered around, I began thinking about the events of the day and a slight feeling of panic krept into my inner being. Its days like this, when you have so much to do, that you get this feeling of frantic energy. It is amazing and horrible at the same time in the sense that it keeps you in check and productive, but it also instills a panic that keeps you dangling on the edge of a stress attack. Though some may hate moments liks this, I, on the other hand, am excited by this feeling today. Funny enough, it has been a while since I have really felt this energy to just go and this focus to do. I read once that people walk through life half asleep. I try to never be that way, but on days like this, when I feel so enlivened by my own productivity, that it makes me realize that I could be doing so much more other days. Slowly but surely, I feel as though I am getting back to the swing of things, I am finding my balance again, and I am waking up.

I attribute a few things to this awakening: 1) My dismissal of coffee into my day to day routine, and 2) My determination to once and for all loose some weight and maintain my fitness. I know many people may read this and think that these are just New Years resolutions that will fade in a month or so, but I am determined, and quite stubborn, and frankly I want a life change. Today has reminded me how much fun it is to have energy, pure energy that focuses not on someone else, but on myself, my work, and on making things happen. (This may start sounding selfish, but I assure you, I focus way too much on others, which is why from time to time, I need a kick in the ass to make me focus on my own life a little).

So, I hope to not only keep coffee out of my life, but also to work out on a consistent basis (it really does make you feel amazing). Then, I hope to start waking up a little earlier and doing a mini work out in the morning. I think a brisk run before my morning shower, will help to boost my energy and keep the caffine adiction at bay. Finally, charity, its going to come back into my life. In that fascet, I intend to let out my caring, motherly nature, rather than trying to giving all my care to an undeserving man. This will also help me to keep the mentality that I don't need to try to impress anyone. A strong woman is impressive simply by being herself. Thats her power, her comfortablity with her self and her drive to do more. New years resolutions or not, I hope that you all get inspired as well to keep those chins up and keep busy.